I haven’t written a basicblonde post since…a long time ago. I actually received an email today from WordPress notifying me that my domain would be renewed in 60 days and I was like ok, cool. Even though I only write once in a blue moon anymore, I’m keeping it because knowing I’ve at least invested this much into myself and my personal hobbies is always a good thing, right?
So for those who are curious and don’t know, which I’m guessing is nobody that reads this article, I’m currently interning at the Cape Girardeau Area Chamber of Commerce. I’d explain to you how much it means to me both professionally and personally to have the opportunity, but that has little to nothing to do with the post I’m about to make so just know that between 8-12 M-F I’m happy, busy and learning more and more each day.
The last blog that the blonde posted was about feeling belittled and so small in the world. I could say that I’ve moved on from those feelings, but that would be a lie. However, I can truthfully say I’ve grown from those feelings and, even though every day brings new struggles, I keep pushing on because nothing is harder than the climb.
I watch Parenthood on Netflix now. I say it in that way because I’ve yet to finish Supernatural and Lost, and I hate watching more than one show at once. But have no fear – I’ve added Criminal Minds, Grey’s, House, Bones, The West Wing and psych to my list…so Netflix has my (mom’s) promise of a continued investment for the next couple of years.
Today’s episode of Parenthood reminded me how small we are in this world. Camille just returned from her trip to Italy and she explained to Zeek that she experienced culture and also realized that in this world she is one of many.
Her dream was to travel and experience and get to know the rest of that many, so that maybe someday she wouldn’t feel like just one.
So I take things like that and keep them close to my heart. I couldn’t even begin to tell the world how many times I have felt small, or pointless and unnecessary. As my time at Southeast ends, I feel like I haven’t left a big enough impact. I don’t feel like I’ve completed something that’s bigger than myself.
Being an orange, (team Chamber) I like my freedom and I like utilizing it. One of my weaknesses tends to be outcasting those around me that don’t fully embrace their independence and it’s something I need to work on. The whole world won’t just stop what they’re doing to take on a new adventure. (Suddenly, I understand why I can’t finish a 9 season series…)
Even more so, as my time at Southeast ends, I find myself scared of growing old. Old just sounds so… boring. I’m terrified of not having a sense of direction come May (someone hire me) and realizing that all of my friends are moving away from me. As much as I love planning weddings, I’m (hopefully) closer to planning my own than I realized. I can’t even raise my roommates puppy, let alone imagine myself with my own kids in 10 years. Hello. Life.
But I’ve let the lack of direction and distance of my friends stress me out so ridiculously much in the last couple of months. So once I heard Camille’s words in that episode it just clicked – grow young.
After all, age is just a number…right?
So I guess here’s a bucket list of things I plan on doing for myself over the next 20 years. Promises I’m making to my young self, because if we don’t live for right now, why live at all? Just because we grow older and more experienced professionally, doesn’t mean we have to do the same with our personal lives. I don’t plan on being like Camille and waiting until I retire to live my dreams.
You shouldn’t either. Chase the dreams while your legs can still keep up, even if your wallet can’t always do the same. I know first handedly the pressures of college graduation. Where am I going to work? What am I doing with my life? How can this help me make money? Who do I need to shake hands with? When does it all fall together? Why did I not start this sooner?
We forget the most important part – taking time for ourselves and working towards the goals outside of the professional world. It’s time to stop only working for others and begin wandering for ourselves.
• Eat my way through Italy with my mom
• Travel to every MLB stadium with my dad
• Road trip across the United States
• Fall in love with something (not someone)
• & also, eventually, fall in love with someone
• Write a novel
• Find and take care of a cat I like (…cats…)
• Start my own non profit (no matter how small!)
• Restore a historic building (currently seeking investors for a timely idea)